07 November 2009

I dreamed . . .

. . . that I had to finish my dissertation. In two months or less; I had to check on dates and make sure that my resident committee members would be around for the defense, and that one from outside the university could come for it. It almost didn't seem worth it, since I was already employed, and then I remembered that I had a job offer contingent on finishing, one for a better job than I have now. A 2-2 load, with a good colloquium series and high-powered yet friendly colleagues who would encourage me to do brilliant work. I decided I would work 8-4 every day, go to the gym after that, make the cats wait for their food and attention, bang out a shitty rough draft as fast as possible and then start filling in details and revising.

I'd like to know if I finished and whether the new job lived up to expectations, but the cat alarm went off. The loud one, not the gentle nudging and purring of the Scot or the heavy breathing of the Tiny Girl. Seriously, no one can sleep through the wails of the Shakespearean Heroine when she thinks it's mealtime.

So I guess I'm back to grading and tinkering with the last big assignment of the semester, instead of dissertating.

But maybe I'm trying to tell myself something about that book I'm supposed to be writing.

3 comments:

Fencing Bear said...

I have those dreams, too! My favorite was the dream I had when I was coming up for tenure. One of the members of my department told me not to worry, everything was going to be fine, they just wanted me to do my oral exams over again.

Dame Eleanor Hull said...

It sounds like an anxiety dream, except it wasn't. I was annoyed about the tight schedule, but in no doubt that I could do it if I just kept applying seat of pants to seat of chair. In some ways, it was even pleasant: I had a very clear task in front of me, which I was sure I could manage, with other people to tell me when it was done.

I was good at grad school. I'd love to go back. Being a professor and having to use my own judgment about when something is finished (or just ready to show someone else) is a whole different ballgame.

Susan said...

What's funny is that at a conference today we were joking about how much we needed to read, and all agreed that in a way, it would be great to do orals again!